Welcome to the Big Brother House!

Day 1 at the airline was nothing like I expected to be. With the amount of castoffs from society all to be living in a confined space for a month, I felt like I was on the set of my most hated TV show Big Brother. Loud mouth wannabes with the IQ of a courgette- my worst idea of company. However, I'm not a prejudiced kinda girl, so I decided to break the ice with them in the bar.

For the main part, my suspicions were true. A lot of them had left school with no qualifications (at which point I felt cheated as I had brought all my certificates to the interview and was asked to show them) and had had previous exciting careers as nightclub dancers, the pound shop and bargain booze. Classy! I took a dislike to some of the straight males right away, especially when one announced to the bar 'I'm here for the pussy!' in a Del Boy accent. The same gentleman proceeded to shout 'she'd get it' after various hostesses the duration of the course and ended up getting fired after his first flight, but that's another tale. 'I'm doing this job to marry a hunky pilot and never work again!' announced a rough Liverpudlian female. Could this night get any worse? Then, I saw light at the end of the tunnel. A group of immaculately turned out twentysomethings with airline ID were sitting in the corner, speaking Italian and Spanish, sipping their espressos. I joined them and thankfully they were also to be my colleagues. Why do the English always have to show themselves up? I don't mean to be a traitor to my country, but I am increasingly ashamed to be associated with these louts, which is why I chose to live abroad. There is more to life than booze, footy and TV, as these intelligent, beautiful Mediterranean cabin crew illustrated. We chatted and I mustered up the courage to speak Spanish with them, conveniently using this opportunity to bitch about our chavvy future colleagues. At this point, two were dancing on the bar, having a drinking contest. Let me tell you, if I were a passenger about to fly with The Airline, and I watched that drunken show, I would be cancelling my flight and taking nice coach holidays in future, not before snapping away with my camera phone and sending pics to the Sun though!